“Invincible Teen” by Vern Fonk

“Recorded in a basement to be performed in a basement”

Portland, Oregon Punk Rock band Vern Fonk, named after a Pacific Northwest insurance broker, have released their first set of recordings in the form of the album “Invincible Teen”. Found during a dive into new releases, “Invincible Teen” delivers gritty, raw, true to form, Punk Rock. Vern Fonk could easily be found on any mid 90’s Punk compilation album, had they existed at that point in history. Simple chord progressions, fuzzy guitar, catchy hooks, relatable lyrics, and a surprising cover of Britney Spears, “Invincible Teen” is a great first outing for this young band.

“ANTI” is the first of this albums simply titled tracks. It is angsty and gritty, and lyrically seems to deal with elitists, either within the scene, or simply life in general. Either way it is intended, the point is made that “You Suck”. “BRADY”, the album’s mostly instrumental song (aside from some background screams), has a great groove/bassline. “CHROMATIC THING” is very Dead Kennedys sounding, complete with vocals heavy on the vibrato and chaotic guitar parts. With a great bass intro, “COBAIN” lyrically follows essentially the same theme as “ANTI”, but with a better hook. The most relatable song, “HALLWAYS” deals with the ever annoying people who linger in the path of others. Whether going to class, as the song details, or in any other aspect, “HALLWAYS” is an anthem for anyone in a rush, with idle people in their way. After having to search just who Vern Fonk the person is, “HONK FOR FONK” makes much more sense. Quick and to the point. These ladies just want some insurance. The most fun, and amusing song, “OCTOPUSSY” is the heaviest musically, but lightest lyrically. Ocean puns galore, to the point it is mentioned within the lyrics, and a slight break in the vocals with a hint of laughter just before the first mention of Octopussy. The fun that was clearly had when recording, comes through in the final product. Next up is “RINGPOPS”, it’s fast, quick, over before you know it, and has no point outside of the existence of Dollar Tree Ringpops, which makes it an almost perfect punk rock song. There are no rules. To complete the 9 song album, Vern Fonk has covered “Toxic”, originally by Britney Spears. It’s an interesting take, and seems like it would be a crowd pleaser whenever played live, because a punk rock cover of Britney Spears is entirely unexpected.

“Invincible Teen” was released 11 January and is available now via Bandcamp.

Bandcamp